I haven’t featured an excerpt in a month!
Keeping up with my NaNo-PAWN count on my third book while editing my first book, plus critiquing for others adds up, people! And real life is in there, too.
So here’s a little scene later in The Unraveling that I’ve just reworked after a crit partner noted I could show more emotion. In it, the Victorian Annmar realizes her proper city upbringing has left out so much that’s important in Blighted Basin.
“Alike?” Annmar wrinkled her nose. “But you know so much about country life—”
“And you know so much about life in the city. I would be a fish out of water there, and I want so badly to visit.”
Annmar eyed the redhead. Mary Clare had a point. “Well, society is complicated, but most city dwellers do master its rules. I could teach you.”
“Just like I can teach you about the Basin. It’ll grow easier, really. Why do you doubt we’re alike?”
She should just tell her. “You also know so much about boys. And I…don’t.”
Mary Clare smiled. “Boys are easy, too.”
Annmar shifted her gaze off, flicking glances around to the groups and couples, some flirting, some showing off in hopes of flirting. It’d be years before she could do that. She sighed. Or at least months.
Mary Clare nudged her. “Step one, you talk to them. You find the one interested in the things you are.”
She glanced around again. “I can do that.”
“Good for you. Practice on Henry. He’s so young, he’s safe.” She turned. “Henry?” The blond boy turned and, with a big smile, edged closer. “Can you show Annmar the table with the cookies?”
“You bet. Need to head that way myself.”
Mary Clare gave her a little push and she followed Henry up to the bunkhouse and food tables. She felt silly nodding along to his chatter. What should she say? Then, he offered her a sugar cookie. “These are good, but my favorites of Mrs. Betsy’s are the chocolate chip raisin oatmeal. Which are yours?”
Annmar blinked. She had to say something. “I—uh—I haven’t been here long enough to have those, but I like these fine.” That answer came easily enough. She took the cookie, and suddenly her tongue loosened. “They look like the moon, though not tonight.” She held hers skyward towards the crescent moon.
“I can fix that.” Henry grinned and took a bite of his, then held out the bitten cookie.
Thanks for reading!
Good news on my PAWN writing: A fellow @NaNoWordSprints writer assures me I can count my words written in November as NaNoWriMo achievments, even though I had my world and prior Blighted Basin books written. And on that note: NaNo, take me away!
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